Prahlada Advises Bali on Forgiveness and Revenge

Bali, the son of Virochana, was king of the asuras. But he was also a grandson, and he had a question that pressed on him. He went to his grandfather Prahlada — the ancient Indra of the daityas, the one to whom all knowledge of dharma had been imparted — and asked directly. "O father! Does forgiveness lead to welfare, or is it better to seek revenge? I have a doubt about this. So please tell me exactly by answering my question. You are knowledgeable about dharma. So please tell me, without a doubt, which of the two is better. I will then do exactly as you have instructed me." Prahlada answered. And his answer was not a choice between two paths. It was a map of when to take each one. "Revenge is not always superior. Nor is forgiveness always superior. Learn the nature of both, so that there is no scope for doubt." He began with the faults of perpetual forgiveness. A man who always forgives suffers. His servants treat him with contempt. Others are disrespectful. No being bows down before him. The learned say perpetual forgiveness should be avoided. Servants fall prey to many sins, appropriating the master's vehicles, garments, ornaments, beds, seats, food, drink — everything. They do not give as instructed but follow their own desires. The master is never shown the respect he deserves. To be ignored in this world, Prahlada said, is worse than death. Slaves, sons, servants, and even those who are not servants speak harsh words to such a forgiving person. They abuse him. They desire his wife. The wife herself follows her own desire and intelligence. Even a slight deserved punishment, if not meted out, leads those who love pleasure to injure him and resort to evil acts. These were the faults of forgiveness without limit. Then he turned to the other side. The faults of those who never forgive. If a person, in the wrong place or even a right one, is afflicted with passion and anger and metes out various punishments on the strength of his energy, he becomes clouded by that very energy. He faces conflicts with his allies. He receives hatred from the worlds and from his relatives. He suffers loss of riches, abuse, disrespect, disregard. He confronts remorse, hatred, confusion, and creates enemies. If in anger he inflicts different kinds of punishments on men, he is swiftly deprived of his riches, life, and relatives. If he uses his force equally on benefactors and those who wish him ill, he is shunned in the world, like a snake inside a house. How can the world confer good fortune on someone who is shunned? People are sure to hurt him as soon as they find a weakness. Therefore, Prahlada said, one should not always be overpowering. Nor should one always be gentle. He who is gentle at the right time and harsh at the right time always finds happiness in this world and the next. Then he gave the specifics — the times when forgiveness is right. If a former benefactor commits a crime that is not too great, in view of the earlier favour, this transgression should be pardoned. Those who commit an offence out of stupidity and seek pardon should be forgiven, because learning is not easily available everywhere to men. Even if the offence is slight, an offender who commits a crime with full knowledge but claims he did not know should be punished — because this is crookedness. The first offence should be forgiven for all beings. But when they commit the second one, however slight, it should be punished. If a crime is committed unknowingly, it should be pardoned — but only after proper examination. And then the deeper principle: "Gentleness can vanquish gentleness and gentleness can also vanquish harshness. There is nothing that gentleness cannot vanquish. Therefore, gentleness is the stronger of the two." But this was not a call to perpetual softness. It was a call to discernment. One must act after considering the time and the place, the strengths and the weaknesses. The wrong time and place can lead to failure. Therefore, one should wait for the right time and place. Sometimes an offender can be pardoned out of regard for the people. These are the right times to forgive. At times other than these, one should use one's energy. The framework was complete. Not a rule, but a faculty — the ability to see each situation clearly and choose accordingly.